The Tale of Gamzee the Prison Clown
by Rainbowkiwii
Summary: Humanstuck AU. Gamzee has gotten arrested for possession of highly potent narcotics that end up killing one of his friends. Tavros happens to be one of the jail guards that has to keep an eye on him. Shenanigans shall happen.
1. Trouble

A 17 year old boy wakes up in a place that is unfamiliar to him. It is dark, cold, and he is outside. There's a green dumpster by the young man's side. He then sits up, with a terrible headache beginning to form. He feels so sick that he can't stand the stomach pain, and proceeds to vomit up the contents of his stomach, which isn't much. Once his stomach is empty, he tries to remember the events that happened only hours earlier. All he knows is that he was at an awesome party, and there were LOTS of drugs involved. He remembers making a combination of highly toxic, not to mention illegal drugs, and everyone liked it, so the 17 year old charged them double the price of a normal bag of weed. He doesn't remember anything else however. He shakily gets up, noticing that he was passed out in the glass of his own broken Faygo. He mumbles to himself about how his friends are a bunch of no good assholes for leaving him behind like this. But before he can continue to walk back home, wherever that was, he hears a car and stops dead in his tracks. The car, which is a police cruiser, parks in front of the open alleyway. This boy knows at this point that he is beyond screwed, but doesn't make a move to try to escape. He would try, but his vision is still blurry, and he just wants to go home anyway. A figure gets out of the car and moves toward him, silently, like a cat stalking its prey. When the figure is illuminated by the street light overhead, it is revealed to be a woman with a walking stick, and strange red glasses. This man had seen some pretty strange things while he was on drugs, but this was definitely not the drugs talking this time.

"H-hello?" the boy rasps out, not realizing he was almost not able to talk.

"Gamzee Makara." the police woman says, as if she expects him to confirm that this was in fact his name. Gamzee shakes his head yes, then coughs a couple times. He must've smoked more than he thought last night. The lady nods quickly and asks him to step forward. He obeys, and she hand cuffs him, telling him he's under arrest for possession of narcotics. The word 'narcotics' brings back some of his memory. A flash back of two of his friends Nepeta and Eridan taking a hit from his rainbow colored bong take over his mind. He then remembers that somebody started a game of truth or dare, but he still can't remember the rest. If only he could concentrate...

"Answer me when I'm asking you a question, Mr. Makara!" the cop lady says while whacking Gamzee in the head with her cane. Gamzee rubs where she hit him and apologizes. He then asks her to repeat the question. She groans in frustration. "I asked you who else was involved in this party." she says irritably. Gamzee tells her that there were only five other people involved. However, he can only recall the names of three.

"Eridan, Feferi, and Nepeta were involved, but I don't know the rest of the motherfuckers that were there." Gamzee says with a shrug. When the lady hears the name Nepeta, she freezes. Gamzee suspects something is terribly wrong. She takes a deep breath and delivers the news.

"Gamzee, your friend Nepeta died of cardiac arrest from the drugs." the cop says. She then forces Gamzee into the car, which isn't that hard considering the 17 year old is shocked beyond words. Nepeta... dead? Tears sting at the corners of his eyes, and his breathing slows down. How could he do this to his friend? Furthermore, what is Equius going to think about this? Equius was Nepeta's closest friend. Not only that, but he was planning to ask her out the following day. And it was all Gamzee's fault that he ruined it. Gamzee doesn't say a word as the two make their way to the prison grounds.

...

Once they arrived, the lady let the young man out of the car. Gamzee was still too shocked to react like a normal prisoner would, so this was easy to handle for the cop. She placed him in line with hundreds of other inmates, and they all shuffled slowly away from the entrance of the place. Each one of them was evaluated slowly, until it was Gamzee's turn. Evaluation was over faster than he initially thought, and before he knew it, he had his mug shot developed. In it, his hair was messier than it usually was, his clown make up was smudged, and he had three long scars that stretched diagonally across his face. He didn't remember how he got the scars, but they were there. He looked at his mug shot for a long time until a stranger came up and told him he looked like an asshole. He turned to the stranger and was about to tell him the same, but decided that he didn't want to get in trouble immediately. But this guy seriously had no room to talk. He wore 3D glasses and different colored shoes for god sake, how hypocritical can you get? Gamzee wondered how a scrawny little nerd like him even got into jail anyway. _Motherfucker probably hacked his way in here. _Gamzee thought bitterly as he moved to the bathroom to change into his jumpsuit. When he emerged out of the disgusting smelling bathroom, he thought of how freaking uncomfortable his orange jumpsuit was. It itched in places where the sun isn't supposed to shine, and it was still smelly and dirty from whoever was unfortunate enough to use it last. Once that was over with, he walked to where his cell was supposed to be. He scoffed at all of the guards that were stationed there too. They all looked pathetic and small compared to him, considering he was over six feet, and kind of strong for his age. But the person he really couldn't help snickering at was the warden. He was just barely five feet, and looked like he had no muscle on his scrawny figure at all. Unfortunately for Gamzee though, the warden caught his small snicker.

"Hey! You with the stupid clown make up! Get the fuck over here now!" Gamzee rolled his eyes and made his way over to the angry man. As soon as Gamzee stopped in front of him, the nasty warden told him to get down lower so he was face to face with him. Gamzee almost snickered again, but obeyed anyway. Without any warning or hesitation, the warden slapped him in the face. "Listen shitstain! I am Karkat Vantas, and I run shit around here. It's my job to make sure you cock suckers don't fuck around in get your selves more in trouble than you already are. So I suggest you respect me as you would your parents, or there will be consequences. Got it?" Karkat yelled. Gamzee nodded, acting cool, but not feeling it. His face hurt like a bitch, and Karkat had brought up a sore subject. His good for nothing parents. He remained bitter as he made it to his cell. There was nothing much else to do besides fall asleep at this point. So that's exactly what he did. This day was going to be a long one.


	2. Alliances are Made

Gamzee woke up in his cell. He almost had forgotten where he was, until he remembered last night. His headache may have been gone, but the terrible memories were not, and visions of Nepeta's dead body were certainly not helping. He wondered how the rest of his friends were doing. Probably hating his guts, he'd imagine. He sighed sadly and got up off the uncomfortable bed. There was no use in sulking now. He did the crime, and he'd face the time. He thought about it a little more as he realized he didn't even know how much time he'd have to face...

10 years. He'd have to spend the next 10 years of his life in holed up in this dark and creepy place. The news came as kind of a shock, but only because he expected WAY more than ten years in prison. He expected a life sentence for what he had done, but the court system in his area seemed to be a lot more gentle than most court systems, recognized the murder as an accident, and just gave him double the five years he was supposed to get for possession of the drugs. He didn't say anything though, 10 years was good enough for him. But walking away from the court, with all those judges dressed in teal garments staring him down, he couldn't help but feel that every single one of them were wondering the same thing: Why hadn't his dad showed up for the trial? Gamzee already knew the cold, hard truth of why. His dad just simply didn't care for him. Gamzee could hardly recall a time when his dad was around. And when he was, he acted cold toward his son. The juggalo didn't know why his dad had to act mean around him, but he was glad that at least his dad didn't abuse him. Well, that wasn't entirely true either...

Stop. Gamzee couldn't stand to think of his father anymore. He cleared the thoughts out of his head and got up. He walked out of his cell and stretched, only to find that the cafeteria was open. Even though the food looked disgusting, his stomach growled from the scent of greasy bacon. He started to walk forward, noticing the nasty warden giving him a suspicious look. In his head, Gamzee had flipped the warden off. But in real life, he gave a cheerful wave in his direction, like a happy school girl would do. That seemed to make him angrier, and Gamzee had to turn away because he couldn't hold back his snicker. He finally got to the front of the line, now starving, when he noticed the person in front of him was the nerdy kid that called him an asshole from yesterday. Gamzee decided that he'd follow this dude to his table and see how many friends he could make. Gamzee hadn't been to prison before, but he knew one thing: In order to make it, you gotta have allies. They had to be people that'd back you up when you get your ass handed to you on a silver platter. Once Gamzee had gotten his food, or what was almost considered food, he tapped the weird 3D glasses wearing guy.e turned around, recognizing his face immediately, and smirking.

"Hey you're that juggalo asshole I met yesterday, aren't you? Gamzee nodded, and the young man motioned for the stoner to follow him over to the table he sat at. It was noticed that this guy had a lisp, but Gamzee didn't say a word about it. Once they reached the table, introductions were made. "I'm Sollux, this is Vriska, and that is Kanaya. Any more questions?" Sollux said motioning toward the two ladies that sat before him. Vriska sneered while Kanaya quietly sipped her tea. Gamzee did have one more question.

"How did all of you motherfuckers get in here in the first place? Gamzee asked as he took a bite of pancake.

"Well I pushed somebody off a cliff and paralyzed him. Since I did it on purpose, I got five years in this godforsaken place." Vriska practically bragged.

"I'm in here for sawing a man in half." Kanaya stated simply. Gamzee nearly choked on his pancake upon hearing Kanaya's crime.

"Dare I ask how many years you got in this place?" Gamzee asked her cautiously.

"A life sentence." Kanaya stated simply, as if almost bored with the conversation. Gamzee nodded slowly, taking a mental note that he really should not get on her bad side. However, there was a question still weighing on his mind.

"How did you two end up in an all men's prison anyway?" he asked.

"Well some dumbass thought we were guys, so they placed us here. By the time they discovered we were chicks, they were too lazy to send us back." Vriska said rolling her eyes. Gamzee nodded, also mentally noting how messed up the system here was.

Night time approached fast, and the four had became good friends over the day. Even when Vriska threw a bitch fit at Gamzee beating her in Uno, the four still kept each other in check. When the time to go back to their cells came, Kanaya found herself asking how Gamzee got his scars. To be honest, it had totally slipped his mind that he was trying to remember where these came from. He told her as they were walking away from each other that he'd try to remember over night. As he lay in cell, sleep refused to come to him. It probably didn't help that there was quite a ruckus coming from outside. He groaned and got up to see what the hell was going on. As far as he could tell, there were new recruits coming in to guard since a major group of old jail guards had quit recently. The story was that 10 of them had been brutally assaulted by some tough inmates. They had promptly quit when they discovered that their insurance would not pay for their injuries unless they got a new job. It was truly ridiculous, but they did it, leaving the prison security under staffed. Gamzee peered at each one of the new recruits as Karkat yelled at them and told them not to be pussies. There were only two interesting ones in his mind. One was a tall, lanky girl, with extremely curly hair. She didn't look like she could defend anything, but as Gamzee had learned with Kanaya and Karkat, looks can be deceiving. She also had a slight, dark aura about her, and that must've been why Gamzee was drawn to her. He shuddered at that thought and focused on the second person. The second one was a boy. He wasn't spooky like the girl, but what intrigued Gamzee was that he had robotic legs. Also, his eyes. Gamzee couldn't get over his big, chocolate brown eyes. If that wasn't enough, he also looked almost afraid to be there. Gamzee almost didn't want this poor stranger to be scared, but shook his head at those thoughts. Why would he be interested in a person he hardly knew? He decided that going to bed and trying to remember the events that took place a night before would help clear his head.


	3. Weird Feelings

Happy New Years all my lovely readers!

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_Kill them... they don't deserve to live as long as your around..._

_No..._

_But they betrayed you! Sent you to Hell! You managed to get one of them already, just kill the rest!_

_You... you can't make me!_

_Do it._

_No! Get out of my head! Get out get out get out!_

Gamzee woke up in a cold sweat. It was the middle of the night. His head had really began to hurt, and that nightmare seemed to increase the intensity of the pain. But this nightmare was different from all the others. Instead of Gamzee running away from something that was chasing him, it was only was only a voice. It was eerie and ominous, almost commanding. He wanted to do what the voice had said, but resisted against it. Also, he had no idea who the voice was talking about. "You managed to get one of them already, just kill the rest!" Was it talking about Nepeta perhaps? No. No way. Nepeta had died of cardiac arrest, which Gamzee had not intended to do. So, what was it talking about then? Everything about this made Gamzee's head hurt, so he decided sleep would be best, even if it meant risking another creepy dream. He calmed himself down, and slowly drifted off...

_You stabbed her, don't you remember?_

_No I didn't! Leave me alone!_

_Then how did she die?_

_Cardiac arrest!_

_Oh, is that so..._

Gamzee woke up once again, except this time more angry than he had ever been with the voice. It was lying to him. Messing with his head. He had had a similar voice before, telling him that his father cared about him. It was lying. Every voice he'd ever heard was a lie. He grumbled and got up. It was now day time, and it was once again time to eat breakfast with his comrades. He walked outside of his cell only to discover that the scared boy from yesterday was walking toward his cell. They nearly ran into each other, but stopped short when they almost collided.

"Oh, uh, hello Gamzee." the boy said shyly, looking away. Gamzee was still in shock, but smiled back at the guard.

"Hey motherfucker. How'd you all up and know my name?" he drawled out casually.

"Um, Karkat told me I was the guard responsible for, uh, keeping an eye on you." he said a little less nervously. Gamzee chuckled at him, taking a mental note of his cute shyness. Wait. Cute? Gamzee didn't usually find boys cute. Oh well. He smiled and told the boy that it was nice meeting him. They were about to part ways, when Gamzee suddenly stopped.

"Hey motherfucker, what's your name?" Gamzee asked.

"It's Tavros." Tavros said with a small smile this time. Gamzee nodded and walked away, toward the cafeteria. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Tavros go into his cell, performing his duty, which was to check Gamzee's cell for drugs, knives, etc. While said clown was standing in line, someone behind him came up and attempted to scare him. He turned to see Vriska sneering at him. He smirked.

"Hey bitch." he greeted, grabbing an egg and bacon sandwich.

"Right back atcha'." she said as they walked back to their usual table. "I saw you talking to the guard. He's pretty cute, isn't he?" Vriska asked, staring Gamzee down with a devious smirk. Gamzee got kind of uncomfortable.

"He's not that motherfucking cute..." Gamzee mumbled as Kanaya and Sollux joined the table.

"I think I came in on the wrong conversation." Sollux said as he and Kanaya sat down. Gamzee prayed to God that Vriska wouldn't keep pestering him about Tavros, which is exactly what she did.

"Soooooo do you like him or not?" she asked, leaning against him to try and get an answer. In truth, Gamzee thought he was kind of cute. However, he still didn't know much about him, and Tavros was probably still uncomfortable around him, considering he was an inmate. So Gamzee answered truthfully. Or what was close to truthfully.

"I like him, as a friend, I guess." He hoped this would get Vriska off his back until he figured out what the hell was going on with him. Hell, he didn't even know what this weird voice thing was all about. He didn't really want to dwell on it too much though.

"Alright cock suckers, listen up! Since it's raining outside, you can't play basketball today, or run the track." Karkat announced after breakfast was done. A loud groan was heard throughout the cafeteria. He told everyone to shut the fuck up as another announcement came up. "You can, however, go to the gym today. Also, the movie room is open. So go do something!" Everybody except for a remaining few got up and dispersed to go do whatever they wanted to do. Gamzee was kind of confused. What kind of jail had a movie room?

"Well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm going to go watch a movie." Sollux said, getting up. Kanaya, who had found a magazine to occupy herself with, hardly said a word as she got up and walked in the direction of her cell. Vriska followed Sollux, having nothing else to do. Gamzee was about to go somewhere too, but suddenly felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned to see Tavros standing there, nervously smiling at him. Gamzee gave a grin back and told him to sit down.

"Hey motherfucker. Come to check on me again?" he asked.

"No, I just wanted to see if you wanted to play, uh, a game or something." Tavros said. Gamzee grinned and produced a deck of Uno cards out of his pocket. When they began playing it was silent, but not long after, Tavros began making small talk.

"So, uh, what'd you get in prison for Gamzee, if you don't mind me asking."

"Oh, I just did a lot of drugs and ended up killing one of my motherfucking friends." Gamzee said, feeling guilty. Tavros was almost embarrassed to have asked that, but nodded anyway.

"And, that group you hang out with, I haven't really seen them much, but are they people you've known for awhile?" Tavros asked. He then blushed upon realizing that he made it sound like Gamzee had been here several times before. Upon seeing this blush, Gamzee laughed.

"I know what you mean, Tav. And, no, I've only known Sollux, Kanaya, and Vriska for only a couple days now." he said. He then noticed that Tavros had frozen up when Gamzee said Vriska. His eyes had gone wide with fear, and Gamzee couldn't seem to get him to snap out of it. He was beginning to get worried, until Tavros snapped out of it. "Uh, you ok there motherfucker?" Gamzee asked, concerned. Tavros nodded.

"Yeah. It's just, I heard you say Vriska, and it reminded me of a horrible girl I knew." Tavros said, regaining his composure.

"Why was she so horrible?"

"Because she crippled me."


	4. Breakthrough and Breakout

Sorry about every word being in bold. My computer is acting up. I'm surprised this isn't in bold. Bad bad computer :l

* * *

"W-what?" Gamzee was more shocked than he had ever been in his life. He started to piece together the missing links as Tavros just sat there, more confused than he had ever been. Gamzee had known Vriska was bad, and he hardly had known Tavros, but this just seemed plain wrong! Plus, Vriska had probably known Tavros's face as soon as walked in the prison, and was planning to stir up some nasty rumors about the two. _Calm down Gamzee, you're making a bigger deal out of this than when you figured out you accidentally killed Nepeta._ he thought to himself. His conscious was right. As long as Vriska stayed away from Tavros and didn't start rumors about them, everything would be fine. Tavros however, still didn't understand what was going on. Gamzee reassured him that everything was fine and that he just remembered something weird. Tavros seemed satisfied with that answer. They continued to play as Gamzee formulated a plan in his head. The plan was to try to keep Tavros away from Vriska as much as possible, since it seemed that Tavros hadn't seen her face quite yet. He wasn't sure what his new found friend would do if he saw her face, but he guessed it would be something like resigning. And truth be told, he really didn't want Tavros to resign. Tavros was like a small bundle of joy to him. Even the voices in his head were blocked out by Tavros's conversations. The two finally ended the game, with Tavros beating Gamzee for the first time.

"Guess I won. In your face." he said as cockily as a shy boy could get. Gamzee laughed and cleaned up the cards. They continued to talk until Tavros's shift was done. Dinner had befallen Gamzee quicker than he would've liked, but he managed to say good bye to his friend and get food before pretty much everyone else.

"So GZ, did you hang out with that security dude the whole time?" Sollux greeted as the group sat down. Gamzee nodded as he chewed, watching Vriska sneer out of the corner of his eye. He could tolerate Vriska the previous few days he had known her, but he wasn't sure how long he'd last anymore.

"Getting to know the cute guard, are we?" Vriska said, nudging Gamzee and winking. Gamzee kept his cool as he only nodded silently. Now that he thought about it, he was starting to like Tavros more than he liked this whole group. All they did was insult each other, which got tiring after awhile. It was almost a relief to go back to his cell and let his thoughts sift around in his mind. Unfortunately, he knew he'd have to deal with one more thing tonight: that damn voice. _Calm down Makara, it shouldn't get to you tonight. Not like it has very night you've had it._ He sighed as he got ready for bed. This week was probably going to be a long one.

Indeed it was a long week. This was the month that the people of the prison were required to do at least 15 hours of community service, and the juggalo had worked his ass off all week. Plus, he hardly got any sleep with voice still repeating the same thing over and over in his head. And he certainly didn't convince Karkat that he wasn't a bad guy, which was slightly frustrating. But what made each day worth it was seeing his favorite buddy Tavros. They'd play their usual game of Uno while cracking light hearted jokes and talking about themselves in general. For example, Gamzee learned all about Tavros's childhood in less than two days. It was always a big disappointment when Tavros had to go, and it also meant sitting with Vriska again. Vriska constantly bugged Gamzee about hanging around Tavros. But little did Gamzee know that what the bitch would do next would change everything with him and Tavros.

"Heeeey Gamzee, Tavros is coming right about now to play cards, right?" Vriska asked. Gamzee was suspicious.

"Yeah, what's it to you motherfucker?" he replied.

"Well I just thought I'd play with you two tonight." she answered with a devious grin. Gamzee choked on the drink that had been drinking. He was truly trapped between a rock and a hard place. If he let her stay, there was a risk of Tavros resigning. But if he made her leave, she'd start nasty rumors about who knows what kind of stuff involving homosexuality. Gamzee knew that being gay in prison put you very, very low on the food chain. Even if he did feel attracted to Tavros, he still couldn't admit it. He really did feel trapped. "So what's it going to be Gamz? Do I get to stay or not?" Vriska asked with mock impatience. Gamzee sighed.

"Yeah." he said, holding back the bitterness in his voice. Vriska seemed a little shocked at first, considering she expected him to say no. But then she smirked again and replied with a cheerful, "great!" That's when Gamzee got an idea. "Stay right here motherfucker. I gotta pee." he said, walking in the direction of the bathroom. When he got to the bathrooms, he prayed that Tavros would be guarding right outside as he always was before he went to play cards with Gamzee. His prayers were thankfully answered. Tavros was surprised to see Gamzee at the bathrooms and asked what he was doing. Gamzee smiled.

"Just wanted to let you know that our spot's been taken today, so I thought we'd go sit in another area." Gamzee said casually, hoping that Tavros would take the bait. He did, and they went to the other side of the prison, where there was some extra tables. They sat down at one and began playing and talking as usual. But tonight, the conversation took a kind of different turn.

"So Gamzee, you never really, uh, told me about your past significant others." Tavros said, blushing a bit. Gamzee knew he was referring to their last bet. The bet was that either one of them had to talk all about their love life depending on who lost, since it was an embarrassing subject for both of them to discuss. Gamzee laughed and sighed.

"To tell you the truth motherfucker, I've never really had a lover before." he revealed. Tavros seemed shocked, but also kind of relieved.

"I thought I was the only one." Tavros said as he gave a light hearted laugh. "But you seem like a nice guy, uh, so I don't really get why you haven't got a lady friend yet." Tavros said. Gamzee sighed as he put down his cards and looked away from Tavros. To be perfectly honest, girls were scared of him. He'd try to bring one home, then when they were just getting to cuddling on the couch, the voices would come and attack him. No girl would ever come near him after a few times of that. Boys were different though. They understood his problems, and actually wanted to help. Gamzee had never had a girlfriend before. Only two boyfriends. But Tavros wouldn't understand. Nobody would. Gamzee felt tears sting at his eyes. Tavros was taken aback at Gamzee's behavior, but didn't know what to do. So he did the only thing he could think of to do. He lifted up Gamzee's chin, and kissed him, full on the lips. Gamzee was surprised at first, but soon accepted it. He also finally accepted that he was in love with Tavros, the boy who had lit up his world in this shitty place. When they pulled away, Tavros seemed really embarrassed, and blushed so hard his face closely resembled a tomato with a mohawk. But Gamzee just laughed and hugged him back. This was the first time he had felt 100% happy in this place. A great big miracle, something that Gamzee had almost completely forgotten about since being off the drugs, had happened. They parted ways as Gamzee wanted to do nothing more to do than go to bed and dream of Tavros. However, he needed dinner first.

"Gaaaaamzeeee, I missed you and Tavros at rec time! You take a long time to go to the bathroom." Vriska said as the usual group sat down.

"Well I got side tracked by prison dudes wanting some information." Gamzee said trying to contain his smile. Vriska just rolled her eyes and continued to eat. Barely two seconds later, a man with a crazed look in his eyes came running over to the group's table and plopped a sheet of paper down on it. He pointed to it and then ran off, with what appeared to be copies of the paper in hand.

"What the hell was that for?" Sollux asked as Kanaya picked up the paper. Kanaya took one look, then her eyes widened in shock. The group was now very curious to know what had been bestowed upon them. Their eyes widened in shock too as they realized that this man had managed to get a copy of the prison map. Upon inspecting it closer, the man had drawn an almost microscopic line throughout the prison. The line of escape that is. People around prison could hardly contain their excitement as hushed conversations were had about time and date of escape. It had seemed everyone was on board with the plan, except Gamzee. Not only had he just discovered that Tavros had felt love for him, he also didn't think he could he could bare to see any of his friends again. Not after what happened to Nepeta.

Gamzee lay in bed, pondering what to do. Should he tell Tavros about the escape plan?

_Of course you should. Once you get out, you can finish what you started._

_But I didn't kill anybody!_

_You mean you really don't remember what happened that night? You don't remember smoking way too much, taking the bong and beating her to death with it?_

_That didn't motherfucking happen! You're lying to me! You always do!_

_Then why did you wake up in the middle of an alley?_

_I don't know, probably part of a dare gone wrong or something._

_You are a very ignorant boy..._

Gamzee shot up in bed, heart pounding. He couldn't take it anymore. He had to tell Tavros.


	5. Such Horrible Things

Well god dammit. I thought the last chapter was in bold. Stupid computer -.- But anyway, I'm so sorry this took a long time to do, please don't not love me no more :o(

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It was morning again. Lack of sleep had plagued Gamzee, but he knew he had a mission at hand. A very risky mission at that, and in fact, he wasn't even sure if he could complete it. He could tell how much his fellow inmates had wanted to get out, and felt really bad about ruining their once and a life time opportunity. But even if he did let them escape, he'd have to fake being excited to be going home. He could hardly even do that after recent events. Also, he couldn't just tell them that he wasn't excited about getting out, they probably wouldn't understand. He formulated a plan in his head as he ate breakfast. The others noticed his unusual silence.

"What's up GZ? You're not cracking stupid, clowny jokes like you usually do." Sollux said. Vriska only sneered.

"Gamzee's been thinking about his boyfriend, haven't you Gamz?" Vriska said with a laugh at the end. And that's when it happened. Gamzee couldn't take Vriska's childish mocking anymore. Sure it was just stupid, but it had gotten to him. He suddenly leaped across the table and pinned Vriska down, holding her by her shirt collar. Her heart beat at a million miles an hour as he spoke to her, in a low, dangerous tone.

"You keep referring to him as just a security guard, or just some guy that's 'cute.' Well I know what you did to him. I KNOW WHAT YOU MOTHERFUCKIN DID. And it makes me so mad. SO MOTHERFUCKIN ANGRY. Why don't I just kill you right here and now? Bet that'd teach you." Gamzee said as he wrapped large hands around her small neck. There was a whole crowd of prisoners now, and the security guards had a hard time getting through to the action. Vriska struggled to get free, but to no avail. Her face just got more blue the more she struggled. The worst part was that Gamzee seemed to be enjoying this. His smile was sickening, but was soon wiped off his face by the fact that something had just stung him in the leg. He looked down in time to see a needle being ripped out. But before he could react, he found his vision had grown blurry, and he collapsed. Just before he blacked out however, he looked at the guard who had got him. Even though he could hardly see anything, he could just make out the innocent face of the guard.

_Tavbro, I'm sorry... _was all he could think before he blacked out.

Gamzee woke up in a cold sweat. What time was it? He looked outside and saw that the moon was up and full, which means he had been out for a few hours. He could hardly remember anything. All he knew right now was that the voice he had heard every night in his nightmares was back. This time, it was worse than ever.

_So, you snapped again. This time, it was at another poor girl. You're lucky that she's still alive, or you'd get_ _the death sentence for sure._

_So what if I snapped at Vriska, she's a huge motherfucking bitch, she deserved it. Sill don't explain why I supposedly killed Nepeta._

_Ugh, you honestly are the biggest idiot I've ever had the displeasure of sticking around with. Look, here's what happened. You remember you guys playing truth or dare right?_

_Yeah, so what?_

_So, you were dared to take five hits in a row without stopping. Being the fucktard that you are, you did it. But the smoke was too much, and you couldn't control your actions. You just wanted more and more until you ran out of the stuff. Then, you snapped. You jumped across to Nepeta and beat her to death before anyone knew what was happening. Your friends were so scared they hit you with your own bong until you were unconscious. Then they dragged you out into the middle of any alley and ran away, calling the police. Do you remember any of that?_

_I... I honestly..._

The door slammed open in front of Gamzee, bringing him out of his thoughts. It was Tavros. Gamzee took one look and immediately was ashamed. He turned his head away in embarrassment. But instead of hearing scolding and yelling, he felt two arms wrap around him, and a kiss on the forehead. He was genuinely surprised. Gamzee looked up to see Tav smiling down on him. It was a sad smile, but still a smile.

"Bro... I thought you was gonna all up and yell at me for that." Gamzee said quietly. Tavros only smiled more.

"It's ok Gamzee. Everybody, uh, has their flaws. You just haven't been taking your medication." Tavros said. Now Gamzee was really confused.

"How did you know about my motherfuckin meds?" he asked.

"Oh, being your cell keeper and all, I need to know what you've done in your past, and, uh, stuff like that." Tavros said, blushing a little bit. "And, uh, I know that this could've ended worse, like it did with Nepeta. Wait a minute. Was Tavros implying something?

"Wait motherfucker, what do you mean by, "like it did with Nepeta?"" Gamzee asked.

"Well, you did kill her after all..." Tavros kept on talking, but Gamzee had long stopped listening. So everything was true. Everything that voice said about Nepeta and all the others was... true?

"Wait, hold up a second! You mean she DIDN'T die from cardiac arrest, like the officer said?" Gamzee asked. Tavros nodded.

"It seems like, uh, that officer didn't want you to know... I'm really sorry, Gamzee." Gamzee just stared in shock. All of this time, living a lie. And that's when the voice appeared again. It started to laugh menacingly before talking, like this whole thing was one big, cruel joke.

_I told you Makara! I told you you were a bad person! And now everyone thinks your a freak, because you are. What are you going to do now, hm? Before you answer, here's a suggestion: kill everyone. You hate them all, don't y- _But before the voice could continue, Gamzee had interrupted it. This was the last time he would be taking it's shit.

_NO MOTHERFUCKER. I'M SICK AND MOTHERFUCKIN TIRED OF YOUR BULLSHIT. I'M NOT GOING TO LET YOU RUIN MY LIFE ANYMORE, EVEN IF IT MEANS MOTHERFUCKIN ENDING IT ALL._ And suddenly, as if on cue, Gamzee jumped out of the bed he was in, grabbed Tavros's gun, and put it up to his head. Tavros screamed.

"No! Gamzee, what are you doing?" he asked with intense fear in his voice.

"I'm ending it all, motherfucker. No more bullshit from this clown." he said, smiling sadly as he started to squeeze the trigger. But before the trigger was pressed all the way, Tavros smacked the gun out of Gamzee's hand. Gamzee was surprised at Tavros's angry expression.

"No Gamzee! You can't kill yourself! Why? Because I love you too much to let you go!" Tavros shouted. Then, Tavros broke down. Gamzee dropped to his side and held him tight, while realizing that Tavros was the first person to ever care this much about Gamzee. Gamzee had also realized that the constant whispering in his head was finally gone. He smiled as he held Tav and made himself promise something. He promised to always take care of Tav no matter what.


	6. Epilogue

It has been ten years since that day, since Gamzee's personal promise, and Gamzee is a free man. The prison escape plan didn't end up working because of the fact that Gamzee flipped his shit, and that some idiot left the map on top of his pillow. Anyway, Gamzee had been on high medication since that day, so people weren't so afraid of him. Also, his relationship with Tavros had grown stronger over the years. They had many tragedies, and many successes. They even helped each other become on Karkat's good side. It turned out that Karkat came up with a fantastic method called shoosh papping to help calm down antsy cell mates. Gamzee had also bonded with Kanaya and Sollux a little bit more. Vriska however, didn't get a chance to bond. She was sent to another prison, leaving Kanaya stuck in a prison full of men. But things worked out for her eventually, mostly with a security guard named Rose. But enough about them.

Gamzee stepped out into the open space. It had been ten years since he had stepped foot outside the prison gates. Ten years since he smelled the fresh air of outside. Not the outside of the prison yard, but the outside, in the real world. At first, he was a little hesitant of going outside again. It seemed to him that his friends would never want to see him again. But he learned less than a month ago that all of them had gone their separate ways, so he didn't have to worry.

"Uh, we can get in the car when you're done taking it all in." Tavros said, bringing Gamzee out of his thoughts. Gamzee blushed slightly.

"Sorry Tavbro, just been so long, ya know?" Tavros nodded and told Gamzee he could take as much time as he needed. When they got in the car, Tavros turned to Gamzee nervously and started to talk while driving.

"Gamzee, uh, you know how we've been in a relationship for all those years."

"Yeah motherfucker, why do ya mention it?" Gamzee asked with concern in his voice.

"Nothing. I just had something to show you when we get home." Tavros said looking back at the road.

When the drive was over, Gamzee helped Tav bring all of his stuff out of the car, and they walked into Tavros's apartment. When everything was brought in, Gamzee approached Tavros and asked him what he was going to say about their relationship in the car. Tavros suddenly jumped, as if remembering something.

"Gamzee, could you, uh, go back the car and check to see if my soda is still there?" Gamzee was confused, but complied anyway. He made his way down to the car, only to find that Tavros's soda was not there. He walked back up to the apartment and was about to tell Tavros that his soda was gone, when he opened the door and noticed Tavros clutching an Uno box in his hands. Gamzee recognized it immediately. Tavros smiled. "Look what I found." Gamzee walked over and Tavros handed over the worn out box. Gamzee opened it out of curiosity. But instead of a full deck of Uno cards, there were only four.

"Bro, where'd the rest of the cards go?" Tavros just shrugged his shoulders and told him to pull out the cards. He did, and noticed the first one had the word 'will' written in sharpie. Will? Will what? Gamzee put down that one and read the next one. 'You,' it said. He then pulled all out and read them aloud as he did.

"Will you marry me? What's that supposed to motherf-" Then it hit him. Tavros could swear Gamzee's grin was wider than his face was when he said yes.

Welp, I'm all done with this shit :P But anyway, thank you to all of my lovely, lovely readers for bearing with me this whole time! Every time I get a review, or a favorite, or even a follow, my heart explodes just a little bit :3 So keep being awesome.


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